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Miyerkules, Enero 16, 2013

Sleeping at 4am

I wrote this as my status in Facebook:

Be sensitive :)

Because some "small" stuff may be a "BIG" deal to others :)

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The reason I slept at 4am for a 7am class was because I cried.

I cried about a class reporting sequence. haha! A BIGGIE for me :)

I asked the group after mine (the 3rd group) to present earlier than us - so to literally skip us in the reporting sequence, since my thesis partner and I already had a schedule on the date we are suppose to report.

Actually this happened yesterday, Tuesday. My group (2nd group) and the 1st group were scheduled to report yesterday. But since it will be the first reporting, our professor allowed only 1 group to present. Tomorrow, thursday, my partner and I already had a schedule.

Supposedly I expected that the 3rd group are already prepared for thursday, and that this is no big deal since only the sequence of reporting will be changed. I think we had a valid excuse to be skipped, since we won't really fool around. But I was wrong.

Although I explained our part to the 3rd group, they would not allow the skip in reporting. It was a BIG deal to them. It will only be the sequence that will be changed. They will still report their report no matter what.

I was just hurt by their reasoning and actions although we just chatted about it in Facebook (since I had a hard time gathering them to talk to them about this).

I was really hurt.
haha!
Looking at it from afar, as if I am not me, it seems crazy and just a small issue.
But for me, it was also a BIG deal.

Well I just reasoned that maybe the sequence of reporting really has a great impact on them as my thesis has on me. Fair enough I guess?

My thesis partner told me not to be sensitive about them. But I just can't help not to be hurt or to even care about what they just told me.

I just can't seem the logic why they really hate to report earlier. They tagged it as "unfair".

Well, I was the one asking for a favor, so I guess I don't have the right to be angry or what. It's their decision , and I have to respect it.

I was dumb silent when they (group 3) and my thesis partner talked to me about it.
I just hated to explain further when their minds already made a decision even before I spoke.

Even my thesis partner judged my disposition.
She was easy to judge that I was in the bad mood and so on.

I did not take the time to explain.
I just allowed her to wallow on what she thinks.
I think she thinks she's right without me explaining what I really feel.
She assesses me.
I do feel uncomfortable at times with her too.
I know she feels the same way.
But what I prevent from doing is judging her right away, like the way she did to me.
I think it's wrong, but like the group 3's stand - all of these are OPINIONS. EVERY OPINION IS RIGHT TO THE PERSON WHO SAID IT. How could I contradict that?

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